#day13 – when i had to witness my dad gone..

#throwback

One of the animated movies i like the most when i was a child is Lion King. Not just me, my sisters too, we all love Lion King (basically, we share the same taste of favorites movies, songs, even hobbies, and when one of us likes something new, the others eventually and automatically nodded our head, and suddenly did the new favorite things for weeks and weeks after. Until we get bored or find the newest. Yeah i know, kids.)

It’s a great movie of course, for the kids at our ages. Lion King told us the story about the guilty feeling young Simba for the death of his father, Mufasa, who was the king of the savannah in Africa, and how he fights back after knowing that it’s his uncle who made him feel guilt all this time, that later Simba knew that he’s an ambitious king wanna be.

But that’s not the point of the reason why we like it.

There’s a memory about that movie, that attached to me quite deep until these days at my nearly 25th i finally watch it again, and it’s a tiny little thing. It’s that Mufasa’s voice is somehow sounds like my late father’s, in many ways. That bass voice i could never forget. Because it’s so him. Me and my sisters sometimes jokes about this back then. Moreover, we thought that our dad was as wise as Mufasa the king. Proud about that too 🙂

And, do you know, what is the hardest part of this movie which really made me moved, even until now? It’s the sequence when Mufasa fell from the edge of the rock, then died. I still remember how sad that part is. I still remember how we cried over it. I even feel like i felt how painful it is to Simba to witness his father died. So we always fast forward that part. Even until now, i would never watch that part again.

***

In my real life, i did witnessed my own father died, when i was 21st. Indeed it many times more painful than the movie. Sometimes you just won’t remember or think about it at all, but that was the very last time you saw him breath, that was the very last time you did your best Arrahman recitation beside him. Hope that would ease his sakratul maut. Hope that Allah would give His rahmaan and rahiim to my beloved dad for the hereafter. Ya, sometimes you just won’t remember or think about it at all, but sometimes you just wanna keep that with you all the time, so when you suddenly remember it, you would pray for your dad again and again.

Allahummaghfirlahu warhamhu wa’afihi wa’fu’anhu..

As i whispered to you before you covered by kafan, dad, “ilalliqo fil jannah…”. I love you. Although i couldn’t be the best for you. But you’re the one and only best dad i had. Miss you much.

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